The password is Ethiopia

Oh, CVS. Every time I go there to pick up a prescription - no matter how long they've had to fill the prescription - it isn't ready. I've had to entirely quit myself of the assumption that when your doctor calls in a prescription it will be filled. So, I don't know why I was at all surprised this week when, upon approaching the pharmacist, we began the familiar haggling. "Sanders, you say? When did you drop it off? No, I don't see anything here. Are you sure your doctor called it in?" This is followed by staff receiving the novel inspiration to check their voice messages, which apparently have not been checked in days. Oh! There's that message where my doctor called in my prescription 2 days ago.

This week has been crazy busy and I really didn't feel like I wanted to spend more time driving all the 6 blocks (I know, I know) back to CVS. So, a little exasperated, I mentioned off-handedly, "It's just that I'm going to Ethiopia in a couple days and I really need this prescription before I go." Ethiopia?! All eyes snapped to me, people started smiling, and I began to receive profuse congratulations on my decision to travel to Ethiopia. Everybody stopped what they were doing, wanting to talk to me about Ethiopia and bless me for what I was doing. The pharmacist in the back pulled me aside and furtively said, "I can have your prescription ready in 10 minutes. Can you wait that long?"

So, if your pharmacy is anything like most of the pharmacies I've been to in DC, you might want to casually throw in the word "Ethiopia" without regard to the propriety of its use. You just never know what they might be willing to do when you mention that secret password.

Saturday gems

I love Saturdays. For some many reasons. One is getting to go visit Juanita, who provides endless entertainment. Another is DC bucket list activities.

As a bucket list activity, we headed down to the National Building Museum. Though it was family engineering day, we didn't let our child lack stand in the way. Besides, I think that a group of 20-somethings qualifies for the nouveau family category. (We're oh-so-modern.) We found ourselves at a table-making station, surrounded by all the newspaper and tape you could ever want. So there we were, in the midst of half-hearted 8-year-olds and over zealous fathers, making a newspaper table to see how much weight it could hold. We really poured our souls into this table. JP even brought out his knife, so we knew it was serious business. We drew up schematic after schematic and divided into task forces. When we were ready to proudly present our table, we brought it up for its moment in time. The weighing guy looked at us incredulously, but with no kids to be found, he accepted our over-achieving table.

Weighing guy: "You realize that you're competing against 5th graders, right?"

Me: "Yeah, this is how we get our kicks. We are utterly unsuccessful in normal life, so we have to compete against kids to prove our worth."

John: "Has anybody's been able to hold all the weight yet, or will ours be the first?"

Weighing guy: "Who do you think you are? Just because you're all adults, you think you have a market on strong newspaper tables? Of course others have withstood all the weight!"

Well, all right. Maybe he didn't say that. But his look said it all. Anyway, our pride was merited: our table held all the weight they could bring. In our excitement, we got a tad overconfident and told a 10-year-old boy to stand on it. Now the weighing guy's laughing.

FoodGawker

I am in seriously deep smit with this food site. I could content myself just looking at the pictures, the colors, the unusual names. But, they've got recipes and food tips to boot. Sigh of smit.

Is it me... or is it you?

Ah, there you are emptiness. We two are such handy co-conspirators. What force is it that keeps us knocking heads? Big parties, you say? Oh, yes. That's it.

Is it me? Am I the only one who feels empty and deflated after big parties? In theory, these big parties seem like great inventions: see anybody who's anybody in one place. Brilliant. But, once you start getting into the actual details, well, it all falls apart. Talking about inane things with person after person? Not brilliant. Trying to hold the attention of a person so over-stimulated that they can't keep their eyes on you? Again, not brilliant. Screaming at people just to be heard? Not brilliant, I say. I feel my hours meaningless and stale. But maybe that's not the point. I don't think anybody ever sat down and thought, "Hmm, now here's something meaningful: big parties." I don't believe that everything we do has to be uber meaningful, but I do think that as humans we crave meaningful interactions with our fellow beings.We desire something beyond the superficial, something to give purpose a footing. We seek discovery, intimacy, even vulnerability. And big parties just don't do that. Yet we follow after our fallen god.

But perhaps I assume too much. Perhaps I am among the few disenchanted. Either way, I have to ask myself: Why do I do it? Why do I keep returning to my folly? Isn't there a better way? I don't want to be stuck with co-pilot emptiness, but I choose it. I don't know if I go out of obligation, or just because I do genuinely want to see my friends, and I believe it might be different (always room for a little hope, non?). But, something's gotta change. I've got to find a better way. Who's with me?

Indistinguishable

After many long years of oppression, redheads have finally had enough. Me and my posse of 3 are speaking out. And we are here to debunk some popular myths about redheads. We only have time for one tonight, but it's an important one. Redhead myth #1: All redheads must be related, regardless of the fact that they otherwise look nothing alike. Come on, people! We redheads have got to have at least one other distinguishing characteristic. I mean, does anybody even look beyond our fiery locks? There's more to us than a little ginger. So, next time, please take a closer look, and don't be so hasty to think we all look alike.

I am frequently told I look like celebrities, and I maintain that it is only because I have red hair, and so do they (or have had at some point in their illustrious careers). In order of look-alike frequency:

1. Lindsay Lohan


2. Melissa Joan Hart


3. Tina Fey


4. Christina Hendricks



Really? I look nothing like them... minus the hair color. I hope 2010 will bring a more discerning eye to my public. Meanwhile, we redheads will work working furiously to debunk the spurious myths surrounding us.

Games

Pensive. Confused. That knot that only anxiety has the power to muster. Embarrassment of naivety exposed. Not even the cold wind can coax these worried feet to hasten their thoughtful, plodding steps. Didn't anybody care when I declared my abhorrence of politics? When I claimed abstention from their games? No, they jeer, you are a part of this. Everybody is a part of this; no exemptions. You can ignore them, but the politics will play you just the same. And the politics did play me. Played me, regurgitated me even as I spurned them. Must I play their game to beat them at it? Why can I not stand outside, act outside their realm? Why must their tentacles coil around every corner? Is there no choice? I want to clear a space for integrity, but it is so quickly overgrown. I want to trust another's intention, but I am made to calculate and question. I want to share my knowledge, but I am reprimanded by propriety and exclusivity. I want to say what I think; I do. And I am played, played, played.

The "m" word

I'm not sure how it happens, but over the past couple of weeks I have found myself smack in the middle of marriage conversations with a surprising array of parents (including my own). It has been enlightening to hear parents' perspectives on why we young people aren't getting married as early or at all. Some ideas are backed by research, some are just musings, but all are fascinating to me, because they provide context for viewing my generation's desires and sacrifices. I think a few of their reasons are just off-track entirely. Others are viable reasons, but, based on my experience, are insufficient to explain a complete phenomenon.

And so I sit here stumped, trying to explain what seems to be inexplicable. I just don't get it. I often hear that young people just don't want to get married. That, to me, is glib and unrepresentative. Everything I have seen tells me that desire is there. In fact, it is so much there that anxiety and bitterness can start to run the show. In my experience, and we're talking Mormons and non-Mormons alike, I have been hard pressed to find somebody lacking the desire for marriage. That sentiment is definitely out there, but has been rare enough for me to discount it as a reason for explaining a broad phenomenon.

I have also heard that my generation just isn't willing to make the sacrifices that are necessary to commit to and maintain a marriage. Again, I think that may be true to a certain extent, but that aversion to sacrifices is not widespread enough to be a significant reason. Perhaps others have found it otherwise, and I would love to hear about it. Perhaps I associate with such high quality people (true!) that I miss the reality of the situation.

Other reasons for delayed and absent marriage include addiction to video games, pornography, increasing education levels among women, ease of materialism, selfishness, pride, lack of understanding about marriage, fear of failure, unrealistic expectations, negative feedback from friends and family, and on and on. The reasons behind this complexity surely cannot be explained by one reason, or even two. Even so, I feel consistently baffled by the fact that so many wonderful people who intensely desire to get married, are still single.

It makes me wonder whether it's not the marriage part that people have a problem with, but what leads up to a marriage: in a word, courtship. Is courtship a dying art? Is courtship still necessary in these times? Do we have unrealistic expectations when it comes to dating and courting? Do we shrug people off too early in the game? Are we too set on what we think we want and need, that we don't open ourselves to new possibilities? Are people getting asked out? I think it's pretty clear that our perception of love has been completely skewed by the media. We often believe that is not affecting us, but I think it may have more impact than we want to admit. Do we secretly hope and believe that love will be like in the movies? Do we not appreciate the work that goes into any relationship? Do we over-emphasize a first date? Are we too prideful to take a chance on somebody if we don't immediately feel something for them?

I am really grappling with this. If anybody is still reading this blog (since I never post...), PLEASE let me know what you think.