Behavior change

It's strange how difficult it can be to change a behavior, even when it comes to changing a good behavior to a bad one. I work in behavior change, and supposedly understand some ways to make people adopt new behaviors. Yet, I still have a time of it trying to change myself.

Here I stand, post-birthday gifts, with a lovely ipod touch. It's real nice and perdy, and in theory, I think it could be useful if used sparingly. But I just can't get myself to use it. Perhaps it's because I resisted it and felt a strong moral opposition to it, and then finally caved. Perhaps it's a feeling of guilt. I don't know, but it's like a sense of awkwardness creeps over me, like I don't know how to use it, and I just put it aside. It's like I have to alter my whole world view to start making an ipod part of it. I have to make room for the ipod, but I feel ambivalent toward it. It has to be something you consciously think about, and I just don't. I forget completely that I even own it, and it sits on my bedside table. I see it when I go to bed and wonder, what is it I'm supposed to do with this here thing? Strange, isn't it?